Pro-life organizations are notorious for their association with the Roman Catholic church. Look no further than the recent popularity of Unplanned, a movie about Abby Johnson’s experience as the former director of a Planned Parenthood clinic and her transition into pro-life ministry. Abby Johnson is not only the new darling of the pro-life movement; she…
Brawl at the Woke Place of Unspecified Worship
Construction begins this week at the Woke Place of Unspecified Worship after a fight broke out in the latter part of Sunday’s observance of the Unseen Being. The conductor of the WPOUW, Alec Stone, announced plans to compartmentalize the general gathering room along ethnic and racial lines.
A Universe Tuned for Worship
There’s a theory among some theologians that God sang the universe into existence. It’s a beautiful, albeit strange thought, but Biblical scholars weren’t the only ones to look up at the heavens and ponder a musical origin. Centuries ago, the Greek philosopher Pythagoras theorized a concept called “The Music of the Spheres”. Noticing the mathematical precision in…
Was Jesus Wearing a Brown Body?
Beth Moore has been binge-watching 3rd Rock from the Sun reruns. That’s the only gracious explanation I can come up with for why she thought it a good idea to tweet that our Savior “gave Himself on the cross…wearing a brown body”. For those of you who were toddling through the late ‘90s, 3rd Rock…
Contemporary Artists Are Better Than You
We’ve all met that guy. He’s the one you avoid at parties, the one with a philosophy degree who can’t wait to debate the metaphysics of the chair you’ve just offered him. Maybe he broods in corners, flipping through pages of Being and Nothingness, waiting for someone−anyone−to recognize his unique brand of genius. He exclusively…
[SATIRE] Hellsong High Priest Dead at 62
LITTLE ROCK, AR—Festus K. Drummond (1958-2020), Satanist and blue grass enthusiast, died violently and very much awake yesterday evening in an abandoned grain silo after a long battle with terrible life choices. High Priest of Hellsong United Church of Little Rock for over four decades, his was a ministry pockmarked with controversy.
The Forbidden ‘M’ Word in Pro-Life Ministry
Abortion is murder. Before you nod in agreement, ask yourself if these are the words you use when speaking publicly on this issue. If you are involved in pro-life ministry, as I was, odds are the term murder is not only taboo, but expressly banned in public settings. You won’t find it in pro-life pamphlets…
Bone of Bones 